What should i get when i go to the mall?

Here's what I would do...take some extra metal and shave it down into a shape of a bat. Then sharpen them as much as possible. Buy body armor and paint it black and add a cape. Train your voice to get dark and awkward (three octaves lower should suffice). Buy a military vehicle and change the appearance to look like an over sized movie prop. Then train for years with a crazy man in china and become a ninja. Take up spelunking then buy the lipbalm, six or so bras and the aviators. Dead multimillionaire parents should help cover the cost.